So its been quite a while since I last did a post, and I've been having a think that I might start posting some more article style posts, which have a look at some of the things that really tick me off, or that I'm interested in. I welcome any kind of comments because I think it's important to grasp an idea of different opinions.
Today I'd really like to talk about body image. I know this has been talked about so much in various different types of media, from songs to magazines, but I'd really like to put forward my persepective.
To start with, I'd like to declare that I personally have a daily struggle with loving myself and 'embracing who I am', or loving the skin I'm in. I for one don't know anyone who hasn't made a complaint about the way that they look in one way or another! With me, I can feel the influence of the media changing the way I think, yet its power is so overwhelmingly strong that it is difficult to overlook the brainwashing messages and fully 'embrace the skin I'm in'. I'm a tall person, not over 6 foot or anything, but compared to the people around me I'm relatively tall, (roughly 5 ft 10 or so) I struggle with this idea that all tall females must be thin, that all tall females will be models. A crazy idea I know. But I am not thin, and have never been thin, yet I find myself on a daily basis wishing I was thin, so that I can fit the 'norm' of tall girls. I am in no way overweight or unhealthy, in fact I am most likely the size I am meant to be because I eat well, however, some part of my brain does not allow me to overlook this idea of what I 'should' be. I am almost certain that I am not the only person who thinks like this.
So many songs these days appear to be encouraging women to love the way they look, so Megan Trainor's song 'All about that bass' which tells women to embrace the way they are, ' I know you think you're fat, but I'm here to tell ya, Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top'. As much as I agree that together we should try to love the way we are, I have a real issue with this song. I recently read an article which explored this song further and explained that although it appears to be all for embracing your body, it is actually quite discouraging to those that are naturally thin or as she puts it 'skinny' (which I am fully against the use of, and will mention later on) because she is clearly stating that the 'skinny' girls will not get the 'boys' because they 'like a little more booty to hold at night'. I'm sorry, but how on earth is this encouraging women to love themselves? Perhaps this is an outlet for Megan Trainor for any past criticism's that she has experienced, I think that is good to face the issues that you have with yourself instead of trying to change for others, however, I feel like this is a real dig for those naturally thin girls, who I know a few of. I also feel that this is trying to suggest that we should aim to please men through the way we look, and our body shape, which again is a really terrible message. This idea is also explored within Nicki Minaj's 'Anaconda' where the voice over sings 'My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun', in reference to having a big 'booty'. Although this song appears harmless, it is catchy and quite amusing, I feel like this can easily be brainwashing to the young girls of society, who will purposely aim to increase the size of their 'booty' to impress the men around them and to fit with the popular image of today. Minaj later sings, 'he don't like 'em boney, he want something he can grab', again blatently attending to the needs of the men and achieving their attention, as though it is the most important aim of women. I want to make it clear that in no way am I saying that as women we should just dress like complete slobs, and not try to present ourselves nicely for husbands or partners, all I'm saying is that it shouldn't be encouraged into the young girls and boys today that outer image is everything. People have been saying this kind of thing for decades, but just look at the lyrics of these songs, both about embracing their bodies, and both including 'what guys like' about the outer image of a girl. I feel that this is missing the point, embracing your body should be about loving yourself, NOT about making yourself fit societies 'ideal' in order to get as much male attention as you can.
Furthermore, I also have an issue with the use of 'skinny', and if you haven't already watched it, I would recommend watching Zoella and SprinkleofGlitter's 'Chummy chatter' about the use of skinny and fat on Youtube, because it explores the idea that calling someone skinny is just as bad as calling someone fat. I fully agree with this, I have a friend who is naturally what people would call 'skinny', yet she eats more than me. Several people, she has told me, have asked her is she has an eating disorder to which she most certainly does not! I think it is absolutely out of order for anyone other than very close friends and very close family to ever question if someone has an eating disorder, it's a personal topic which should be approached delicately and sensitively, and not just thrown about as if it were a lighthearted joke. This friend of mine is a model and has walked London Fashion Week and models for various different companies. On one of these companies' instagram is a picture of her modelling a dress, to which one of the followers commented,
"model? What the **** she's ugly as", and another comment, "ew so skinny", and "you need to show your clients true real beauty not the beauty that your models have to suffer for! Eat!"
All genuine comments from people. And these are most likely the same people that struggle with self image and imperfections. Just because you are behind a phone or behind a computer does not in anyway mean that the person will not see the comments. Imagine if someone put these kinds of comments on your pictures, I for one would be hurt so incredibly much and would be so disheartened by what people were saying.
It's as though people assume they know everything about everyone, my friend, who these comments were aimed at, is the loveliest, most generous peson you will ever meet, and she does not deserve this kind of treatment from strangers for a job that she got into through her quick metabolism and desirable looks. How is it possible for society to progress, and body image to improve if there are still such narrow minded people in the world? Yes it is possible that some models have eating disorders, however it is not a strangers place to be calling that out, for all we know, that person could be seeking medical attention, or is addressing the issue, only to be bombarded with negative, dishartening comments.
I think this likewise counts for curvier women, people see and hear comments made about them or of people of a similar body time, and people will take these on board and they will hurt them. I think really, we all need to stop adressing the body types of people unless they are a very close friend or family member, it is not our place to say or judge. If someone's 'skinny' maybe that's natural and if someone's 'fat' maybe that's natural, or maybe they are actually working on the way they look to become healthier and happier in who they are.
I'd like to say well done if you read through that whole thing, it's long, I know! I feel body image is a real topic that needs tackling head on in society, but not in the way the media is doing it. I think it's really important, first and foremost to focus on not saying things to people that you wouldn't like to be said to you, that is, I think the source of the problem. And do not bring up potential eating issues if you do not know the person either at all, or very well. Really I think we just need to take all focus off of body image in the media, all except for the encouragement of being healthy and happy because I honestly think it is damaging to young people's minds today, including mine. And I for one do not want to grow up in a society which has a certain 'look' forced onto people in order to look attractive or appealing. So I think something we should all work on is not judging people on their body image or the way they dress, they might happen to like themselves that way, or they might be struggling, there are many possibilities but none of them are really our business. It's really important to love yourself, before you get into any kind of relationship or anything of that sort, and so I would encourage us all collectively to work on this and accepting who we are and the skin we were created in, because we can't really change our natural form, we should all try to push past the 'ideals' and flaunt all that we have been given!
Fran x
